No BLANKing WAY

So, word on the street is we might see a BLANK anniversary show early in 2012. Could the rumours be true?? (They could: it depends on availability of performers, though, and they're currently spread around the world. Time will tell...)

A Review by any other name

Those who have done any kind of public creative output at the amateur level must know the feeling of wanting to be reviewed. ANY exposure would be good, you think. If only the reviewers would come along to my show/exhibition/recital, the public would flock towards me like seagulls to a potato chip. (That is to say, they would fight among themselves for a piece of me. One may even pretend to be crippled, folding his leg under himself, in order to earn my pity. All because I gave a little piece to one of them, and his loud squawking told the rest there was something here - something worthwhile.)



Even if it's a mediocre review, you still think there is something to be made from it. I did a solo show a couple of years ago, to which a reviewer actually showed up, and actually wrote a mediocre review. In terms of pull-quotes (you know, those things you put on the poster - "Jaw-dropping"... LA Times), the only thing I managed to salvage from the mild-panning I received was "Lead is admittedly funny." Not exactly worth the lights I later had it re-printed in.

Now, those modern enough to have used the internet have probably submitted the fruits of their creativity to be inspected by the public en masse. I'm talking MySpace, Garageband (back when it was a music website), Live.com, Poetry.com (scam alert!) and, more recently, YouTube. The hope - expectation? - again being that if only people had access to my genius I would be discovered, idolised, popularised, and lifted out of this grey existence. It happens for some. Rarely, but occasionally.

Rarer still is a reviewer reviewing a live show which was recorded and uploaded to YouTube as a preview/advertisement for said show. But, you know, it happens!

"Sizzling, tasty... will get your heart pumping!"

And if anyone can salvage a pull-quote from this review they get a free double pass to the BLANK 50th Anniversary Show later this year. Leave your suggestions in the comments below.

http://bacontoday.com/bacon-the-musical/

A wave of fun

So, three more BLANKs under our belts. And what a fun time it has been. To be honest with you, I can't give a good review of the shows because I wasn't paying all that much attention. You see... we narrowly avoided Death the other night.

At the end of our show on Wednesday night ("Soot the Musical") we were backstage towelling down when one of the Princesses (that's what we call the girls from Princess Cabaret; we, in turn, are called BLANKers) received on her mobile phone a text message. It was read out as such:

"Tsunami warning for the East Coast"

Well, it was received with a mix of scepticism and fear. Phone calls were made, iPhones were put to good use, and the warning was confirmed. Fears were put at bay when we discovered the warning was for Lord Howe Island and the potential waves would strike between then and midnight. Over the next 15 minutes, however, the alert level was raised and the NSW coast (I feel I need not specify 'East coast' for I don't really think of NSW as having any other coasts exposed to the sea) was included.

Now, the important thing is to panic.

A moment before Princess Cabaret was to open, the producer heard the updated alert and decided to call the show off. The audience was informed (and greeted the announcement with a similar degree of scepticism and fear as did we) and everyone made an orderly panicked rush to lock up, jump into cars, and get up the hill to safety. Though I note that our hasty retreat was somewhat slowed by the man at the boom-gate who made us pay to leave.

The other (and probably more heavily-weighted) reason I cannot remember much of our three shows thus far - Towel, Soot and Tsunami (of course) the Musicals - is that I've been having too much fun with my shiny things during the shows.

Those who have seen many a BLANK will know that I have a habit of playing non-essential roles. I have continued to do so this week, playing an English-understanding cat and a grisled old man for much of the last two shows and pretty much playing around with the characters and not paying all that much attention to the other characters (or 'lead roles' as they are sometimes called). Which is fine, because they didn't pay much attention to me. An improv writer once called this "finding your shiny thing". It is something that Jon does very well, and I've been quite pleased with doing so myself.



Anyway, that tells you very little about the shows, doesn't it? And we haven't been videoing them. So really, the best way to experience a BLANK the Musical is to see one live. You've two nights left, so please waste no further time.

BLANK the Musical & Princess Cabaret at the Bondi Pavilion Theatre (which is still standing, despite the tsunami alert) tonight and tomorrow night from 8pm. Details at http://tumbleweed.org.au/

A cubist peg in a round hole

So, another long month with no BLANK to keep you warm. How will you cope? How do we?

Brydie, Amanda and Benny are down in Melbourne, funnying it up in their respective shows (Dolls Cabaret and Alice; Beaconsfield the Musical; Axis of Awesome vs a Bee). No doubt some of you have received emails from the free wifi at the cubist paradise of Federation Square.

Tim is putting his voice to (good?) use hosting karaoke.

Jon is teaching kids. He is doing practical placement at a school near you, and also coaching a bunch of young improvisers who will soon be heading over to an improv competition in Canada. Exciting, eh?

Adam? I've not heard from Adam. He may have metamorphosised himself into a tiny insect during some (botched? deliberate?) science experiment and is unable to contact us except by landing on our phone keypads and tapping out a message. But the message would be lost, because Adam never did fully grasp predictive text.

Jason has been organising improv nights of his own, scoring Canadian improv duo Scratch for a charity fundraiser show. Nice work, Jase!

I'm currently in rehearsal mode for a production of Steve Martin's play Picasso at the Lapin Agile. It's a fantastic script, as you would imagine of Mr Martin, and full of history and wit. It is set in a little bar in Paris (called the Lapin Agile, where Picasso did actually hang out in the early 1900s), with Einstein, Picasso, Schmendimen, and other odd genii (plural of genius; not the magical djinn). Obviously there are a variety of accents, and if you've ever seen an improv scene with several accents in them you'll know how they can go awry. So it's practice practice practice and I'm watching lots of YouTube Antonio Banderas clips to get the accent right for Picasso.

Oh yeah, I'm playing Picasso. Which is somewhat coincidental seeing as I fell in love with him when I went to MoMA in New York last year and saw his painting Les Demoiselles D'avignon. The process of painting it - of playing with different styles to create something shockingly new - floored me. Basically, the piece signalled the beginning - the invention? - of cubism. Now, a year later, I am playing the artist just before he paints that very picture.

Anyway, the show is playing from 28 April to 9 March, Tuesday to Saturday. Come along. It will be fun. Scripts are funny things...

Cushion and Jelly. What's next?

We've had two fun shows over the past two nights. Tuesday night was "Cushion the Musical" - a rollicking adventure about Dr Cushings (Pete - a zombie), intelligent puppy Puddles (Jon - with cushings disease; also a zombie), and veterenary assistant Andrew (Adam - creator of said zombies); Susan (Amanda) and her quest to stop telling the truth (learning to cushion the blow); and a Cushion Kid (Jon) who wanted to be loved. The first and last of these things are based on real-life FACT.



Wednesday night was "Jelly the Musical", introducing Elena (who is so good I haven't even been told her last name!) to the improvised musical stage, and with special guest Steve Lynch. Stevie (Tim) is a soccer striker who needed to learn to control his fear; Katie (Brydie) has dreams of turning her priveleged upbringing into a life of high-class prostitution and madamery; Michael (Steve) yearns to beat the 90-pound weakling girls in the jelly-wresting ring, wearing only his spandex bikini. How will they achieve their dreams? And will they appreciate it when they get there? What can we all learn from their example?

You have to be at a BLANK to truly appreciate it. So get along to the Roxbury Hotel this Friday and/or Saturday night and we'll make your BLANK come true.

Another visit to the BLANK

You may have noticed, dear followers of all things BLANK, that it has been some time since we have given you a show, something to read in this weblog, or something to look forward to. Well, let me assure you that things are changing. All three of the above, in fact.

True, it has been some time since we last BLANKed. And in that time much has changed. The dear Ms Buckley has played a big part in the success and popularity of Beaconsfield: The Musical in its Melbourne an Sydney seasons, and is right now setting the Adelaide punters' hearts aflutter. Ms Lee Kennedy has been busily writing and directing her talented Princesses in a new revue, Dolls Cabaret (more on that soon) and some old-fashioned storytelling shows headed for Melbourne. Mr Yardley will soon be hitting our screens in a reality-show spoof about comedians. Mr Judge has been racking up nametags and hairnets in search of fulfilling employment, and thinking up new ways to inspire his cast of BLANKers. Mr Williams has been planning a school excursion to the improv world capital (Canada), starring in Sydney's favourite regular improv show (FBCNL Tennis), and helping steer Sydney's longest-running improv show (Scared Scriptless) to its new format and home at the Roxbury. Mr Lead eloped, avoided being crushed by a glacier, visited Wellington's finest improvisers, moved offices and moved house. Mr Davis took his cohorts from the The Axis of Awesome touring to Edinburgh and Asia, and is set to take their new show around Australia. The last I heard from Mr Rushton he was headed for the snow-fields of Japan and coordinating fundraisers for Willoughby Rotary Society (two separate projects, I understand).

And what of Ms Daley? It would sadden you to learn that she is dead. Thankfully she isn't dead. Keira performed in a fantastic little cabaret called Speakeasy with the newly-formed Cabaret Merlot, and will perform another couple of shows with them later this year (Wagons Ho and The Roxbury Horror Show). Sadly though she is no longer with us in the BLANKing sense, having hung up her BLANKs at the end of last year.

That takes care of the 'giving you something to read' trio of needs. Now for the 'something to look forward to' section. More BLANKs! Next week we'll be back at the Roxbury Hotel in Glebe, this time on the downstairs stage, supporting Dolls Cabaret for four big nights. Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday with BLANK at 8pm and Dolls Cabaret at 9:30pm. You get a discount for seeing both shows, so why not huh?

Go to http://tumbleweed.org.au/blank for more information and to book or reserve tickets.

With all our separate projects, it had been a while since we had all improvised together when we had our first re-rehearsal a few weeks ago. (Yes, we practice improvising. Yes, it's somewhat ironic. But you'd practice for a soccer match, even though that is essentially improvised within a set structure.) After the initial excitement of performing with each other again, the main feeling was self-consciousness. This came as quite a surprise. We have performed as a BLANK cast for two years now, and most of us had performed together for years before then. After acknowledging that and shaking off the alien feeling we got into proper rehearsal mode. What came out then was quite sub-conscious - desires, fears and whatnot. Had I a psych or philosophy background I could possibly identify these as basic Freudian personality/id development building-blocks or somesuch. But I have not, so I'll just say that it was quite a raw reflection of us as humans. It was an interesting experience, and I think it has brought a fresh twist to the BLANK experience - one that I hope will be glimpsed on stage.

Ah yes, the third leg of the tripod of needs: giving you a good old BLANKing. We've got a show. Will you be our audience?

Sacrifice

Buckers and Yardley thought they would hold us back for our latest BLANK, so the remaining five of us and Jason took to the stage on Sunday for an almost-matinee 7pm Roxbury show.

Quite fitting then that we should perform "Sacrifice the Musical".

I quite liked the title, as it gave us a strong theme to build from. The opening number saw Jesus (Jon Williams) lamenting his decision to be crucified; Susan / Sunita (Keira Daley) giving up her weekend to work for Mr Hodgeson (Tim Judge); and John (Tim) and Judy (Brydie Lee Kennedy) being held on detention by their teacher (Pete Lead) until one of them owned up to spilling the milk.

Summarising a BLANK never truly does it justice, and never makes as much sense as the show does on the night. So I won't attempt it here. But feel free to do so on your own blogs, or in email when you tell people about the show, and how they should come and see it. If you weren't there you missed some beautiful moments of scheming and remorse from Jesus and Judas, delightfully girlish manipulation from Judy and her Mum, and the timely growing of a pair from John. And there was also a beautiful kiss. (Followed by Sunita/Keira telling John/Tim: "You never need to speak again.")

Jason was on form playing a mix of hip-hop, Carribean groove, death march, ballad, tango, and a whole lot more. It's a true delight sharing the stage with this man, even if he does take up a whole corner of it and never moves. (Because he's too busy making you move... aw.)

And that's it for another month. Check out the other shows happening around Sydney, including Gorilla Theatre on Thursday 4 September 8pm at the Roxbury Hotel. Stay tuned, and we'll see you in September for the next BLANK the Musical.

Decay the Musical

Our first Sydney BLANK since before the Melbourne Festival, and it was a doozie. From the title "Decay" we discovered the importance of dental care (to ward off the temptations of the evil "tooth bear"), what happens when you scare everyone away from you, and why you shouldn't be so upright and evangelistic that your crippled son runs away. Sugar may be the tool of the devil, but it tastes so good.

My favourite bit was a touching moment where Jon's character told his daughter, Barbara (Brydie), that his wife died because she was never happy with what he did for her. And now Barbara's love, Billy (Adam), had done everything he could to make Barbara happy and yet whatever he did for her just made her demand even more. It was time for Barbara to realise that it was her problem, not his.

And then there was the moment when Tim's religious nutter revealed to Jessica (Amanda) that he too used to love sugar, and pulled out his dentures to reveal the consequences. And then a sugar-crazy street-dweller (Pete) stole them. It was then up to Amanda to (mis)interpret Tim for the rest of the show. It was good.

As good as all of this fun was, in the end we came to the conclusion that everything is good in moderation. And so it shall be, with a BLANK at the end of each month.

Mind you, if you want to see more there are plenty of other shows out there starring various BLANKers. Why, at the Roxbury Hotel alone there is Full Body Contact No Love Tennis twice per month (http://www.myspace.com/tennisimprov) and Gorilla Theatre once per month (www.twistedmelon.com.au). So, should you miss us, do pop in and see us sometime. We'll be around and about.

Take care now, and be sure to pack an umbrella.

More fun and GAMES (the Musical)

Yes, as Pete tells below, I am BLANK's champion of driving games. The secret really is to never, ever use the brakes.

A similar approach worked well for BLANK's season at the 2008 MICF (hold your applause for that segue).



If there were a prize for the Comedy Fest's most over-committed cast, BLANK should've won it - with some people starring in/directing/producing several shows simultaneously, and others doing a lot of stapling before BLANKs. And I mean a lot.

One day, I really hope we'll have cheap electronic-paper flyers that we can add things to digitally - ie: without the RSI of using a stapler. That'd make adding things such as pull quotes from reviews much easier (ready for another supreme segue?). Quotes such as these from Funny Tonne reviewers:

"if you like impro, this is as good as it gets"

and

"masters of impromptu"

Nice.

Speaking of games (my segue-gland has dried up), we did GAMES the Musical. And it involved computers. Good thing we visited Game On, huh? We can claim those tickets on tax as "research" now!

As for brakes (in improv, we call that reincorporation of ideas "shelving" - impro skillz are life skillz, okay?), a few of us also took a bike ride from St Kilda to Sandringham and back again in only two hours. Had we used our brakes, it would've taken much, much longer.

What we learned about video games

It was Wednesday - one of our two days off for the week - and cycling was the order of the day. However, it was Melbourne, and the sun was quickly replaced by wind and clouds. A second plan was concocted: head to the Game On exhibition at ACMI.

Game On is a (mostly interactive) museum of computer games. From the original arcade machine (an early version of Space Wars) through 30+ consoles to machinima. Before we even made it down to the exhibition we came across a two-player driving game.

Lesson 1: Being able to drive in real life means nothing to a machine.
Players:
Pete (11 years' driving experience);
Tim (Red P-plater);
Keira (failed her L test).

Keira and I raced first, followed by Keira vs Tim and finally Tim vs Pete. After the tournament Keira revealed her secret tactic, which was "never use the brakes". Tim revealed his secret tactic midway through the final lap of our head-to-head race for second place when he knocked the back of my car out on a sharp turn, sending me into a spin, careening into the wall, and finally resting facing the wrong direction. My own secret tactic, humility, served me better off the track than on.

Final Standings:
Keira Daley - Gold
Tim Judge - Silver
Pete Lead - DNF (so much for nice guys finish last!)

Lesson 2: Arcade games are racist
Well, old arcade games. For example Metal Slug, a side-scrolling (awesome) arcade shooter, in which you shoot people of Middle-Eastern descent. Actually, they're people of Middle-Eastern residence. So I guess that makes the American soldiers (or are they mercenaries?) the invaders and murderers. Which is just plain racist. But it's lots of fun, especially as you progress into zombie and alien levels. And we had unlimited credits. That's right. We may have paid $15 each to get in, but we would have pumped twice that into Metal Slug alone.

Lesson 3: Life is cheap when you have unlimited credits
A few nights later we walked past one of those tiny arcade parlours they have in Melbourne. No Timezone or Intencity this - just a barren store filled with arcade machines (and Asians). Now you must understand that after the few hours at Game On Keira was OBSESSED with Metal Slug. And the very front game at this arcade parlour, facing us - nay, taunting us - as we walked by was Metal Slug 5. Bam! In a flash Keira and Tim were facing the zombies or racists or whatever this sequel presented. And bam! a few flashes later the machine was asking for more coins. What? All of a sudden the importance of dodging bullets and saving your grenades dawned on the stunned pair.

They may never kill again.

Well, not entirely true. On the last night of BLANK Tim did pick up a gun again to make one final glorious mark on Melbourne. What happened? Find out soon on...
BLANK the Blog

Throwing Down the Gauntlet!

This is a challenge to all the BLANKers out there!
I feel like I could easily go into detail regarding the crazy last few weeks - the Melbourne Comedy Festival - the fact that we done did good and all that stuff. How we had great crowds, did great shows, got great reviews.
I could do that.
No problem.

But I CHALLENGE others to post about it. Go on. GO ON!

Am I right? I'm right, right? Right? Am I right? Its soooo easy.

BLANK About Town

Buckers is quite right - we have neglected this blog in the past few weeks. Here's why...

We've finished our January run. We packed houses, tried new things, and overall, had a splendid time. Cabaret BLANK was surely a highlight - having us all step up and kick some prepared musical comedy proverbial was a joy. And we finished the run on a most daring and fun BLANK with puppets venture.

The month was tops all round - so much so that we've scored a regular spot at The Roxbury Hotel. You can now get BLANKed there on the last Thursday of every month. Wicked. We're kicking it off with our first-birthday show on Thursday 28th Feb...

Yes, BLANK is 1 year old - awww, they grow up so fast.

It'll be a busy week because then we're hitting the Central Coast for a one-off show on 2nd March. We're BLANKing the world, one BLANK at a time.

And now, the weeks draw us ever closer to our Melbourne Comedy Fest debut. Look out Kaleide Theatre, we will BLANK you!

Where the BLANK are you?

I am wondering where the BLANKers have gone.

Everyday I check, and all I see is a lovely photo of myself and Rove. Sure, that instantly brings back good memories but I can just call Rove and have a chat and all is well in the world - what I want when I check the BLANK Blog is blogs from BLANKs. You dig.

I mean, I could post regularly about stuff - for instance, I was rear-ended last night on my way to my singing lesson and I am not using the term as a euphemism. (Keira, should that be an euphemism?) Luckily there was no damage to either vehicle and I made my lesson on time. But you know, you all don't necessarily need to hear about that.

SO I am putting a call out to the BLANKers. Where are you and what are you doing in the wee down time we have before we take on Melbourne. I want to know, nay, I NEED to know.

Apease me.

Quote of the Night

Last night was "INVENTION! The Musical" and I wish to quote my favourite line of the night -

"I'm a survivor" - Mitzi the Cabaret drag queen played by Jon Williams and Puppet.

"Yes, like Kate Moss, or ..... Dickens." - Ms Mahoney played by Brydie Lee-Kennedy.

Gold.

MICF Tickets NOW available

Yeah, thats right. BLANK! The Musical has early bird Melbourne International Comedy Festival tickets on sale now.

And there is even a pretty picture of Brydie and Jon.

What? Am I not pretty enough? Apparently. I don't care. Does Rove look bovvered?

PRESS STUD The Musical!

Jan 8th at the Roxbury bore witness to the first and final showing of Press Stud the Musical, a once-off, tragicomic extravaganza of improvised fun. The plot that remains memorable the following day is given below!
------------------------------------------
Fashion designer with a heart of gold Jessica (Amanda Buckley) discovers press studs, immediately excited by their potential to combine fashion and philanthropy! She shares her excitement with exhausted Thai sweatshop worker Hung (Jon Williams), who is ambivalent about the increase in work. He wants to be seen as more than a cheap worker, he is a man with ideas and drive.

Meanwhile, celebrity Tina (Keira Daley) is utterly smitten with interview journalist and all-round press stud Brian Smiley (also Jon Williams) - and in a dark, dingy, and disreputable medical practice, the arrogant Dr Smythe (Adam Yardley) patches up photographer David's (Tim Judge) injured leg using revolutionary medical press stud technology.

At Tina's house, Jessica is cleaning for the star, mundanely funding her passion. The phone call with Brian Smiley, however, throws everything into disarray, Tina finds nonchalance difficult in the full blast of his smarm, even over the phone. With Jessica's warm encouragement, however, she sets up a date and chooses appropriate clothing. The girls agree (in song, naturally) that she should play it cool.

Back in the news office, David the photographer and the overbearing Brian Smiley have an utterly one-sided bragging competition; Smiley bears away the palm. Nonetheless, the crippled David scores a point reminding Smiley that Tina isn't like any of the multitudes of moronic muff he's scored on before; she has a mind of her own - she's something special. They hatch a plan for David to conceal himself during the date, snapping photos and whispering advice into an ear piece. Like more famous deformed lovers before him, this gives the unrequited David a chance to see his loved one happy.

The dark side of renegade Dr Smythe emerges in a telephone call with his press stud supplier as they work through some kinks in the master plan; a key issue being rust-proof metal. Fueled by megalomania, the increasingly evil Dr demands 6,000 press studs by the next day. His desire for greatness utterly spirals out of control... Whatever those fools at the AMA think, he'll show them... he'll show them all!

Tina and Brian's date looks to be on the brink of disaster, with the invalid David no more able to conceal himself than an epileptic walrus. Luckily, Tina's attention is entirely focused on the magnetic Smiley, and the evening turns to a bodice-ripping success, featuring perhaps the best song of the night, a love duet.

Dr Smythe learns from a terrified Jessica that the 6,000 studs are now in Germany thanks to clerical error, and flies into an incoherent paranoid rage, ranting furiously about invincible German soldiers able to repair themselves in combat. He demands 8,000 more studs, under threat of paramilitary attack. Jessica and the industrious Hung form a plan for defense and begin to fall in love. [Dr Smythe presumably arranges for mercenaries to intercept the shipment, since the next time we see him, he's commanding a thickly-accented soldier of fortune. Jessica and Hung contact the media.]

Immediately before the battle, Dr Smythe reflects on the patterns of history; Alfred Nobel and Oppenheimer both naively believed that their inventions would usher in eras of peace. Both were wrong, so too is the inventor of press studs.

In the ensuing combat, Brian Smiley is shot! His tragic death fills Dr Smythe with remorse, remorse which Jessica drives home. Hung sneaks in, confronting the evil doctor at his moment of greatest doubt. Jessica and Hung, David and Tina show that humanity's greatest asset is love and cooperation, not the hate and destruction Dr Smythe wrought. The Doctor, knowing that the military power of the press stud would corrupt anyone absolutely, commits suicide. The secret of the press stud's terrible power dies with him.

At the twin funeral of Brian Smiley and Dr Smythe, catharsis is complete. With renewed hope Jessica and Hung, Tina and David resolve to press themselves together for strength and support. A moving closing number and the epic themes are resolved!

2007 - A BLANKtrospective

Hello, it's Keira again.

If anyone in this cast is going to sound like they're going all PR on you, it's going to be me. Forgive me - I'm designated publicist so it's compulsive behaviour. For hi-res images, press releases, interviews...

*ahem*

I'm going to look back on a year of BLANKs (wow - Seasons of Love from the stage musical RENT just started playing at random on my iTunes. Normally I'd hit skip, but it seems oddly appropriate right now). As this blog is an expression of our self-obsession, it seems like the right thing to do.

So, how do you measure a year in BLANKs?

Last Tuesday night's A Very BLANK Christmas show at The Roxbury Hotel was "Ham the Musical". Though we had an absolute ball, we did violate a policy we created a few months ago: "No more food BLANKs".

But I think we can forgive ourselves. Food vocab is incredibly evocative - rife with associations, puns and double-meanings. Someone should do a thesis on that and use BLANK as a case study. Or maybe they should go for a walk outside in the sunshine and enjoy themselves - I’ll leave it to them to decide.

But there has been a lot of food. Our first-ever full-length BLANK, at Coogee Arts Festival, was "Cucumber the Musical". Our second, at Twisted Melon Impro Festival, was "Bacon the Musical". And in rehearsals we've had "Cracker", "Corn", and "Coffee", among others.

But they're not all food. During our season at The Old Fitzroy Theatre we had "Camera" (what's with all the C-words? Somebody trying to tell us something?!), "Antarctica" and the even less edible "Undulating" (what were they thinking?!). I'm not sure you'd want to eat a "Tinkerbell" either (mmm, crunchy), which was one of our Cracker Comedy Festival shows.

Taking the show to BrizImprovFest was certainly not food-related. In fact, good food was very hard to find...

All the same, the tour to Brisbane was definitely a highlight of BLANK 2007 - aptly-titled "Light-Switch". I may never forget about ol' Grandpappy Slappy, the ancestor without vertebrae. How we got there from "light-switch" is really anyone's guess. But that's BLANK for you.

At the Old Fitz, I loved "Weasel" and "Hostage". Thanks to our special guest, Rebecca De Unamuno, we learnt how to weasel our way out of anything - including OCD and speech impediments.

Another show that I really dug was "Bacon". And, lookee here, we're back to food! With Bacon and Ham, we’ve had two pig-based BLANKs, no less. "Pork" must be in waiting somewhere (but, dear audient, that is all up to you...).

Of course, "Bacon" was more about bakin' bread or bakin' on various illicit substances than it was about the meat. There was also an upstanding cop "bringing home the bacon" to his 'ho of a wife (FYI, we tend to have a few 'hos wind up in our shows because it's an easy rhyme) and a vegetarian/vegan/"I'm not sure which yet" who refused to eat anything if it comes from an animal. Unless it's dairy.

It may often be edible but, admittedly, BLANK isn't always delicious (*cough*Scapegoat*cough*Wisdom Teeth*cough* ... *ahem*). Sometimes things don't quite go our way. But two not-so-great shows out of sixteen in an improvised production's first year ain't bad at all.

Then, with a season back at The Roxbury, a reprisal at Cracker, more touring and a debut at Melbourne International Comedy Festival all slated for next year, the future of BLANK is looking pretty damn sweet.

Not surprisingly, then, at the end of 2007 we’re all feeling pretty chuffed with ourselves - and most grateful to you for supporting us.

Viva la BLANK!

Keira

Brydie BLANKS

I'm the only cast member whose name starts with B, so my name will always sound better with the word BLANK than any other cast member's name. I often wonder if that was why I was cast.
I also often wonder why Amanda feels the need to bash me on stage and why Jon uses puppets to feel people up in shows when he could just use his hands.
I occasionally wonder if our musos, Benny and Jason, secretly resent each other and if one of them will become a "rogue muso", just like Faith in Buffy the Vampire Slayer. It will probably be Jason, because Benny was there first and Jason has brown hair.
I also occasionally wonder if Pete and Keira were ever secret lovers. I hope they were, because there is not enough sex in the BLANK cast and I'm sick of picking up the slack.
I rarely wonder if Adam works for a fisherman pants company as an unofficial spokesmen- a sort of Cash For Comment scenario. I would wonder this more often, but I don't think there is such a thing as a fisherman pants company. And I don't know if underpaid hippies can afford to pay for publicity.
I have never wondered if Tim is actually a robot who can time travel and therefore goes into the future and returns with the plots of all our BLANKs, which he then performs and nudges us into performing, so that when people say "You're making it up? Really?" we're only sort of telling the truth because, in some pocket of time, every BLANK already exists and if the future can be considered as "solid" as the past and present, surely a time traveller COULD know information from the future and then be sent crazy because they are forced to re-enact the scenario they know to be inevitable, thus negating free will- both in life and in BLANKs. Now I have wondered it, so something I wrote only 20 seconds ago is no longer true. Way to make me question myself Tim.
MY CHRISTMAS TREE JUST ARRIVED!

A day in the life of a BLANKer....

Hi. My name is Amanda and I BLANK.

I am probably best known for inappropriate dance moves and my desperate attempts at "Diva" moments. Anything to get noticed really. I also elbowed Brydie in the face once during a show - but it was not a BLANK so you know, don't hold it against me.

You know a lot of people, well, a few people, well, one person, actually, my Mum asked me when will I settle down and get a real job?

I say, Mum, I have a real job. And that job is keeping a dream alive. Thats a 24/7 affair my friend, and if you have a problem with that then maybe you don't really love me. And if you don't really love me, than what kind of mother does that make you Mum?
That didn't really happen. My Mum is awesome and if I hear of anyone saying anything about her, I will cut you.

Post Unintentionally Left BLANK